Today I received some orders for my soap. This hobby has definitely taught me patience. Patience with a lot of things, people, organization, writing, and patience with myself. It's nice and difficult at the same time. But with everything, God continues to show that He is in the midst.
Recently, I've been putting scripture to the test. I started to tithe monthly earnings. It feels good to give back what God has given me. I also started to pray with a friend at a particular time of day. So that both of us are praying in sync and Jesus says where two or more are gathered He is there also. I believe He hears me.
Speaking of scripture, I've decided that when I find scripture that speaks to me, I bookmark it so that I can write about it later when I work on the devotional. There are so many lessons that God has taught me through the years. For years, I've said that I've wanted more out of people. I want to understand scripture and most of all I want to continue my relationship with God. He has never given up on me and I can't give up on Him.
Last night, my husband was saying the words I was thinking. He also spoke the words that I have heard others tell me. I get frustrated easily with other believers because I feel that so many of us, including myself, we get stuck on the surface of faith. We get comfortable. And this place is not the place to get comfortable. When I look at my relationship with God, I want to continue walking forward and I can't do that if I stay in the same place.
I want to dig deeper into faith. I want to learn about the relationship with God that CAN move mountains and NOT bat an eye because, as Jesus said, this is what we are meant to do. I get so upset that I cry for the lack of care on behalf of believers, yes believers! Last year, I was in a Wednesday night discussion and the teacher asked us who our hearts reached for. Some said children and others said the lost, the hungry, etc. And I kept thinking of believers.
I do not believe that once we are saved we are always saved. I refuse to use God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit as a crutch like that. How dare we. In eighth grade, a girl, a few years older, than me argued that she believed in once saved always saved because when you know Jesus you will want to continue to grow with Him etc. Now, I completely think what she said is right. However, she was taking her own argument a step forward. She was saying that WE as believers are the ones who SHOULD want to CONTINUE our relationship. Not that just because we are "saved" we are always "saved".
Everyone always talks about how much God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit love us. My latest breakdown made me realize why I was struggling and getting angry with others. You see, I get irritated a lot in church when the time comes for "testimonies". If it was praise instead, I wouldn't have an issue.
But testimony is a strong word for me. It means the moments God stepped out and changed me. It means the instant I became aware of something new and God was glorified. People so very often say the following for testimonies, "I love God", "He's blessed me", "I'm glad I'm not a sinner"..etc. Now, do you see a pattern? The pattern that makes me angry and hurt. It's selfishness!
In our human ways, we are so selfish. Let's go back to the phrase, "once saved always saved". What does it mean? It means you are saved from Hell because of Jesus. I'm going to come down hard on this but you know what it's really not about us reaching Heaven or Hell. It's about Jesus, God, and the Holy Spirit. And it is BECAUSE OF THEM we need to walk straighter and dig deeper in our faith with Him because despite how selfish believers get, it's not about us!
Now, saying that, there are probably raging questions like how could you say that? How could you accuse the very people who believe that they are selfish? Um, because it's true. Paul said that when you are a child you need milk but when you are an adult you put childish things behind you and you eat meat. So many believers today are selfish children who still need milk and yet they lack a child like faith. I get guilty of this myself so please do not think I'm throwing stones because I'm including myself.
Every time, I have learned something difficult it was hard but God showed me how to deal with it. And He in recent years kept trying to get me to focus on the narrow way. I'm seeing that He is saying that the narrow way includes believers. The many includes believers! Many are called, and there are many believers still and yet few are chosen. Few will be the elect of God!
It's kind of like the story with Gideon. God narrowed the men that were with Gideon to just a few out of the called men that were with him. God did this to prove His glory, least the more men there they would glorify in themselves. And boy do believers glorify in themselves. The "testimonies" are so very often about the people themselves. "God has blessed me" not that blessings are wrong but just what blessings are being discussed? Most often, it's family, income, or material things and these things revolve around the person saying it. But what if God blessed you with a lesson that can reach others and not just yourself. What if the blessing was directed more so at His glory and not at what you or I gained? Or the "testimony", "I'm glad I'm not a sinner."
Hearing this just turns my stomach. Jesus, was the One who went to the sinners! How dare we act like a Pharisee and be like, "at least we are not a tax collector". Do you understand what I'm saying? We are NEVER EVER to compare ourselves to another person! I DO NOT CARE IF YOU ARE BETTER OFF! Just so you know, God doesn't see it that like that. He sees you and I, when we speak that way, turning against one of His kids whether or not there is pity or sadness when the line is tagged on, "but I hope they find Jesus before it's too late because ....etc" The Lord is the sole Judge of all! This is territory many believers stumble in and we are so blind to it do to being comfortable! Be warned, that this can and will be counted against you and I if we speak this way!
Testimonies are stories and situations in which God is glorified! God makes Himself known! Do not abuse the word! Do not focus solely on yourselves and do NOT make yourselves sound better than others! I mentioned earlier that everyone talks about how much Jesus, God, and the Holy love us. We need to reciprocate that love right back to Him. We shouldn't focus on ourselves in praises. There's a song lyric, "Every blessing You pour out, I'll turn back to praise." We need to give back to Him. Not because we can equal what life Jesus has given us, but because we need to further our relationship with Him and He will be glorified!
God will always be glorified even from the beginning He made it known. Instead of believers giving this impression upon others of "we're entitled" we should be the ones with humble, broken hearts for others. Jesus has compassion on others and we need to as well! I come off harsh to believers and myself because God does not hold anything back on us. Nothing is hidden or will be hidden from His eyes. I have been realizing that believers are unequally yoked with God.
Let me explain, what I mean is people will act one way in church or do good things like charity, as an example, but that's just it. Doing what is right and nice is not going to cut it with the Lord. He definitely tells us to take care of others, I'm not against that. What I'm concerned about is that people become consumed with, "doing what is right" and forget about the One Who deserves and glory and attention. He is first for a reason. It doesn't matter how good you may be. If He isn't acknowledged there is an issue.
People aren't changing their relationship with God. They are comfortable with where they are. They do not work on their walk. They want to believe that all is well. We can't do that. Jesus, as we know, traveled a lot. He reached many and the very ones who should have supported Him, the believers, were the ones that often doubted Him. Even His disciples so often questioned Him. Jesus would often talk about faith to them. The Bible talks about there is much love but faith is hard to find.
Jesus told the Pharisees that their generation will not get a sign even though they wanted one. He told the people that there is One greater than Jonah in the midst of them meaning Himself. Jonah's job was to warn those that what they were doing was wrong. Jesus was doing the same thing. He was trying to guide people to God through Him because what was being done was not right. What I couldn't understand though, is that Jesus gave so many signs to the people.
Perhaps He meant that because the people had, "ears that did not hear and eyes that did not see," for that reason they didn't see the signs. I see so many understandings that God gives me everyday that are comforting. I'll turn to the Bible and I'll find answers to my questions that I asked God when I talk to Him. I'll have dreams with Him reminding me that no matter what to always turn to Him. We, as believers, need to have eyes that see and ears that hear. We need to continue to walk even when we can't physically see because faith is about trusting beyond what we see. God says when we are on the right path, the narrow way, that He will not let our ankles stumble.
We, so easily, become entangled with our yoke. We become liars because we preach one thing and yet act another in secret. The person we are in secret, the person that our other "Christian" friends don't know about, that is the person God wants. He wants our whole self. We need to be honest with Him. We can preach all we want in the streets and give praises and "testimonies" in front of men. But if we cannot work with the Lord in our walk with Him and increase our faith. We are liars. Not only will God have nothing to do with liars but it is WORSE for someone to know God and turn against Him. Remember, not everyone who calls Him Lord will be received by Him.
He says that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Every time we stumble in the dark because we turned to our own yoke, we need to turn and glorify Him. He is known as the Deliverer for a reason. Do not let the thought that because you did something wrong you cannot praise Him in the current state. Give Him your issue, your dark thoughts everything now! He will turn anything into light for HIS GLORY!
We raise our hands and glorify Him. He will show us the right way but we can't simply hear Him with our ears or see with our eyes. We need to hear and see with our soul. That's the connection of the heart. That's the purity of His will. He has a plan for us. How long will we hurt His heart when we turn away? He is Alpha and Omega and has no end, but we do. Will we have something to give to Him in the end?
Jesus taught me it's okay to be angry with believers, "be angry and do not sin". We are to lift up each other and that means we need to hold each other accountable. I know, I'm young compared to many. I have always been misunderstood by many ever since I was 13. But my God, He understands me. He has guided me through out the years when the only Teacher I needed was Him. Man fails, God doesn't.
I'm not saying I'm perfect, I am quite aware I stumble. That's why I'm sharing all of this. It's what my husband and others have told me. That maybe, God wants me to share what He's taught me so that He is, as always, glorified whether or not people listen to me. Jesus taught and He knew not everyone would listen to Him. I want to be like Jesus and I want to glorify God. I want to continue to learn about Him, scriptures and faith. I want to reach people so that God is glorified!
That's why I'm writing a series and why I started a devotional. God has done so much for me and others, and it's about time I give back to Him. I want to learn what it takes to be an elect of God. The road will not be easy and it will be hard to find but you know what...God is on that road and I just want to say thank you to Him. I do not want to bury a talent in the ground. I want to increase it so I can give it to the Master who gave it to me.
In all things, He is good. Amen.
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